One recent weekday morning, my Twitter timeline started filling up with soundbites hashtagged ‘#putchocolateinasong‘. Although you won’t believe me, my own idea for the following cocoa-infused playlist was already well underway. The crucial difference? The songs I selected already have a dose of chocolate in the names, whilst the puntastic track titles on Twitter were pure parody.
Before you look at and listen to the below, take a peek at the Tweets and let them entertain you. @ccandrewbaker put forward ‘ ‘s the Way (Uh-Huh, Uh-Huh) I Like It’, and @wapple15 dared the Twitterati at large to ‘Flake My Breath Away’. Wham proved popular, with @FightingSwiss’s ‘Wake Me Up Before You Cocoa’, and @Cdmp1983‘s ‘Careless Wispa’. @SupermanTweets even posed a philosophical chin-stoker, asking; ‘What If Godiva Was One Of Us?’
With my own tasty two-part playlist, I attempted to provide pleasure both aural and oral; determining what choc each ditty would be. You may completely disagree with my highly unscientific findings, but then taste in chocolate, just like in music, is something entirely subjective.
Want to know how each chocolate sounds? Click the pic to hear the tune…
Shanks & Bigfoot – Sweet Like Chocolate
When I were a lass way back in the late nineties, this catchy-as-flu two-step garage number was on everyone’s portable CD player. Zingy, lively, fun and frivolous, and as sweet as the title suggests, it’d surely be Chocolate Tree’s Organic white chocolate Forest Fruit bar.
Kylie Minogue – Chocolate
An utterly seductive track from the pocket-sized princess of pop surely deserves to be likened to a creation by chocolate royalty. Lucky, then, that it’s the aural equivalent of ‘The Highland Chocolatier’ Iain Burnett’s award-winning classic, naked (ooh!) Velvet Truffles.
Crowded House – Chocolate Cake
Jazzy yet mellow, as uplifting as a cup of coffee with a comforting splash of milk – or, indeed, Aneesh ‘The Chocolatier’ Popat’s Cappuccino water ganache truffles: their quirky, planet-like appearance concealing a smooth, rich combination of Javanese milk chocolate and luxury coffee.
Tay Zonday – Chocolate Rain
Cadbury Dairy Milk in song form, this novelty track is a complete fruit and nutcase and ‘boasts’ an irritatingly urgent, irresistible, compelling hook that you know you should walk far away from, yet still find yourself creeping back for more. Devoid of pretension, neither song nor pseudo ‘choc’ takes itself too seriously… ‘queasy listening’?
Electric Six – Chocolate Pope
Danger-danger: the wholly-delicious chocolate this holy-sounding song calls to my mind might induce a religious experience. Like the track, Rococo’s 65% Grenadan Grococo Jasmine Bee Bar is bold-starting and deep-voiced, and features playful, flitting topnotes – in the choc’s case, contributed by jasmine tea and essential oil.
Chef – Chocolate Salty Balls
This tongue-in-cheek number is actually rather well-crooned, featuring gravel-tinged vocals from South Park’s resident Chef, aka Isaac Hayes. Rich but smooth and mellow, with a playful edge, it’s got to be a Winchester Cocoa Company liquid muscovado caramel – an AoC award-winning recipe with a naughty twinge of ginger.
Soul Control – Chocolate (Choco Choco)
A lively-as-hell, hip-shaking, samba-style song of this order calls for something beautifully fruity and totally and utterly tropical. Were it a person, it’d be Carmen Miranda; as a chocolate, it’s Hotel Chocolat’s brightly-hued, extraordinarily tart’n’tangy Mango White Chocolate truffles.
Buddy Wasisname and the other fellers – The Chocolate Song
Wobbling along the tricky tightrope between very very silly and very well-constructed with admirable aplomb, Buddy and his mates’ dotty ditty is actually underpinned by a solid folksy heritage sound. Ludicrously lovely, like The Chocolate Tree’s oddly gobble-able Haggis Spice bar.
Rufus Wainwright – Cigarettes and Chocolate Milk
This gorgeous track is a little eccentric like its singer, with a fruity, deep and complex sound. In spite of that, it’s sweet and very easy to enjoy – in short, the oral treat for this aural beat is Lucocoa’s intriguing raisin-y, coconut-sugar-sweetened and lucuma-laced No. 6 Natural Blonde white chocolate.
The Undertones – Mars Bars
What can one suggest here but the punktastic track’s branded bar? Well, The Grown Up Chocolate Company’s Very Naughty Nutty Nougat Bar, actually; which will not only help you work, rest and play just as long as the old slogan suggests, but also assist you in going nuts to this song’s kerr-azy sound.
The Undertones – More Songs About Chocolate and Girls
This track has texture. It’s rough and riffy, yet sweet and likeable, a description that’s well-fitted to Duffy’s Oak-Smoked Salt & Nibs Corazon del Ecuador 43% milk chocolate. Like the band, the man that makes it is superbly-skilled yet manages to maintain a spunky, punky attitude to the craft in question.
- Look out for more twinned tunes’n’chocs in Part 2 of this post next week.
- To read more about Academy of Chocolate award-winning chocolate, click here
- To read more about The Chocolatier, click here
- To read more about why chocolate experts love Duffy’s, click here